Sunday, February 5, 2017

An army encounter

This was affecting me for a long time and therefore i wanted to add. It all happened one day when i realised that one of my classmates had been an officer in the Indian army before leaving the army altogether after marriage to join her husband who was working abroad. She was in her 20s when she was selected after hard rounds of interviews into one of the most sought out officer positions in the armed forces !

She used to describe about the perks of being in the army and that it was such an amazing life.  I who dreamed of joining the army once, could not help but exclaim "Then why couldnt i join the army. Why was everyone discouraging me from doing it ? ". The answer came from her and others "because you can get killed". I could not believe it or even that a former officer would think so about death in that way. Do many indian army officers fear death ?

My mind always told me that getting killed for ones own country and people was the greatest honour.  I could not believe that one can abandon one's country like that.  Was i turning into a "sanghi" ? Did i harbour a hidden animosity towards the woman because she left the army and went abroad.

But i was still silent when she continued saying "all these Indian guys want to leave india and come abroad to settle down here. I know you all want the same too". "No, not everyone" I wanted to say. But i realised : perhaps i lacked the will power needed to apply to such a position despite all the discouragement.

I understand that armymen and women had to face the harsh living conditions and even death for the mistakes of our political leaders. But isnt that part of such a life. But it is a sad affair that positions in  government services (even outside armed forces) are very hard to get and even despite the competitive entrance exams and interviews,  often reserved to those with connections in high places.

Well we cannot blame the selection criteria as well : how will they know the ones who harbour a true passion to help the people ? Ones who will not abandon that for any luxury or prestige ?

The issue of Tina Dabi made me further contemplate that many students just apply for a job in administrative services for the prestige of the position. How else can we justify her getting in with the reservation quota despite her parents taking benefits of reservation and having brought her up in such good conditions. I think a person who is going to be a model for people , one who really wanted to help people should have cracked the IAS without taking any reservation. 

An iPad and some tears

I still remember the day I got an iPad. It was an iPad mini. September 2014. I just had got the latest Samsung galaxy phone and already had an iPad. Played games on the ipad sometimes. I had seen friends posting pictures on Facebook of their latest phones and tablets. I had also read about a man who sold a kidney to buy an ipad. And here I was with the latest phones and tablets and denying to use anything.  Mid 20s but I was behaving like an old man who would say that there are more important things in life.

My reaction was to burst into tears inside. no not tears of joy. My thought was on the people who made these phones and on the millions of hungry people. Was it recyclable ? Why are we buying so much stuff which we may discard after a few years ? The manufacture of these devices and all the related processes had provided many with an income. Yes. But did I deserve all these luxuries. My answer to myself that I did not. I had a strong urge to leave everything and go into social service. I needed to make the world a better place but well without offending anyone i have grown up with. I think I delved into depression that day.

How many people get depressed when gifted with an iPad or iPhone ? Well that was me and my answer to this was : this was not what I needed ! I deserve a simple life (talking as a spoilt brat whose parents had worked so hard). What is simple ? Well a question to which I myself could not give an answer to.
All that I know is that I am typing this from the large screen phone which was gifted to me and in which I regularly check the pictures of latest cars.